I am dubious about the whole personal web-page thing -- that much I am willing to reveal. What is it about the three funny W's that makes worldwide weenies open up their lives for scrutiny when they would never dream of pasting up their names in a phonebox? It can't just be to waggle their programming cojones: First of all, HTML is ridiculously simple -- if they wanted to strut their stuff, they'd do it in VRML at the very least, or else hack into the Joint Chiefs of Staff computers and bomb Disneyworld.

Where will it all stop? Wedding pictures? It's been done. Next will be an MPEG of the baby's birth, and then, as the population ages, of the sigmoidoscopy, and finally, the coffin-cam, which will allow people to finger the account to find out if the corpse is spinning in its grave today.

And here I am doing it. But you'll get no photos of me in my worst haircut of the last 10 years, no ordered list of favorite pastimes, no URLs of other neato websites. That's because I'm too busy scrawling my name and phone number in telephone booths around the globe.

people have pried here, not counting me.